DaXxS’ QuAck QuAcKs

was deeply disturbed when I saw a YM stat message that said: "God, sometimes, you just don’t come through." Little did I realize that it was a line from Tori Amos’ song (God). A lot of people ask if God is good and all powerful, why does he allow bad things to happen even to those who call on His name? Here are some thoughts I wish to share about the subject. First, God gave man the authority to do what he wants here on earth, and God can only change things here when people allow Him to. Whoa. Now that’s one outrageous thought. But in Genesis 1:26, God practically gave us dominion in this physical realm. If we also examine the notion that we are all connected and that what we do affects other people around us and also affects succeeding generations, wouldn’t it make a little sense that our world is a little messed up? But thank God for those who pray "Let your will be done, let Your kingdom come." Second, life here on earth is temporary. This is not the big picture. That is why nobody will ever understand the full meaning of life without having sought God first. Things happen for a reason. Sometimes they remain a mystery because we can’t see or understand the big picture. All the more we need to trust in God because He’s the only one who knows. Third, I believe that God is not a genie who grants our every wish but a Creator with a purpose. We are His creation. When a computer is unplugged, it can’t run the way its supposed to because it is not connected to the source of its power. We type and type on the keyboard but stuff doesn’t come out on the screen. The same thing happens when we pray but want things to happen the way we want. I have realized that It doesn’t work like that.. God has all the power we need when we get in line with what He wants to do. Those are the rules ;p - I John 5:1. Another of these purposes is for us to become His children. God never intended us to become spoiled brats who always get their what they want when they want but for us to become mature individuals with the mind of Christ. Things happen in life. We shortchange ourselves when we allow ourselves to become self-centered. When we allow ourselves to be hurt because God doesn’t seem to listen, remember: Jesus went through all of that suffering because He trusted in God’s will not his own. We can’t even imagine what he wen’t through. God wants us to be strong–not spoiled weaklings. There are some things we have to face in life because those are opportunities for our faith and relationship with God to grow. We don’t see it and we don’t feel it but God is there with us always. We don’t know it but He gives us strength to endure. So sometimes, when we think God doesn’t come through…it might be time for us to grow up and go through it.

A Friend of Mine

He’s three years my junior and fondly refers to himself as my “baby boy” Standing at 5’9, I think it’s pretty adorable of him to make up such a pet name. It has caught on somehow and I’ve gotten the hang of calling him as such though I must admit, it’s still difficult to suppress a smile each time I utter those two words. Come to think of it, it’s never easy to keep a straight face around him. He comes up with the wittiest replies that never fail to crack me up. The same way he consistently takes my breath away with every encounter. He carries himself really very well, very neat in his ways yet not one big stiff. I can’t help but swoon at each sight of him. He walks with the coolest gait and holds his head in the snazziest way perhaps to flaunt his well styled crowning glory.

Eating plays his first fiddle, I love to see him devour his favourite yummies – he can consume a hundred fries and still have room for burgers. Watching other people gobble up that much food makes me wanna throw up but when its him all I can do is offer him a glass of coke and whistle in amazement.

He’s the best listener I’ve ever met. He likes to be heard so he gives others the same privilege. He’s always interested in what I have to say. He remembers my stories even the littlest details. That makes me feel special J . His invitations for walks are more than enough to make me special and send me to cloud 9.

Unfortunately, I am unable to match the joy he brings to me. Though I know that shared conversations are appreciated. I am aware that my words don’t end him transcending sky high the way his do to me. He’s more to me than what I am to him. I love him but he doesn’t love me. For a time I thought I wouldn’t be able to keep pretending and that my heart would explode if I continue on playing the game. For a time, I felt I had to walk away from the friendship. It wasn’t a real one anyway, I reasoned. I had ulterior motives. He might say I was taking advantage!

I schemed ways out of the relationship then I realized I would be on the loosing end if i let go just because I had this feelings. He may not love me back the way I love him but he has taught me more than just a few lessons along the way and surely there would be more in days to come.

I may never be more than just a friend to him but, as one song goes…” then again I’m glad.”

The  weather didn’t even make me think twice about going to
Boracay during this rainy season. My boyfriend and I need a break, and I didn’t
care if it was raining as long as there was sand and water in front of me.

We arrived Kalibo at around 2:30 pm then went for an hour and a half road trip to Caticlan on board a van. From Caticlan it took a 10 minute bangka ride to finally get there. It wasn’t raining when we arrived at the port, but it was kind of
gloomy. That is why instead of heading straight for the beachfront, the
ferry boat dropped us off at the back of the island. There, we found
tricycles lined up, charging P100 for a “special” ride to any resort.

I just wanted to drop my bag,ran towards
the water and twirl(this is not exaggerated).

Too
bad, no amount of words can capture the excitement we experienced
during the 5 days and 4 nights we were there, but I’ll be sharing
snippets nonetheless. Prepare to get very very jealous.

We write to apologize.
We ask to look past life as it goes by.
I know you have sacrificed time,
life, love, time to fly.
Please consider all things trite,
forgiveness will be the thing that gets us by.
I know to have something like this
broken is hard to fix.

Embers, we’re burning bridges down.
Oh! Envelopes stuffed with feelings found.
To write this down as means to reconcile.

We write to patch things up,
maybe not to agree but to proclaim love.
Let’s look ahead and then we’ll see the one
whose glory never ends.
And based on that we’ll see,
there’ll be room for change, but gradually.
I know to have something like this
broken is hard to fix.

Embers, we’re burning bridges down.
Oh! Envelopes stuffed with feelings found.
To write this down as means to reconcile.
If all is said and done and over,
if we don’t have to, we’re not gonna.
Make the change, it’s worth the try.
What’s broken can be fixed tonight.

Embers, we’re burning bridges down.
Oh! Envelopes stuffed with feelings found.
To write this down as means to reconcile.

             You were the first thing in my mind when I woke up this morning.How I wanted to embrace you,tell you how important you are to me,thank you for everything that you’ve given me.If only I can cross the distance between us in just a snap.But I can’t,neither can you.I want you to know that in this life, when things seem to turn uphill and whenever I feel like my life takes a nosedive into the abyss,the thought of you pulls me back to the fighting mode.Your love for me carries me through all of life’s struggles.It’s the same love that keeps me safe at all times because I know that miles away,you never fail to whisper your prayers to Him,to keep me safe and warm.No one will ever love me the way you do and I will never meet someone who I will love more than I love you.You are one of the best gift God has given me.

Thank yOu MIke!

i like for you to be still
It is as though you are absent
And you hear me from far away
And my voice does not touch you
It seems as though your eyes had flown away
And it seems that a kiss had sealed your mouth
As all things are filled with my soul
You emerge from the things
Filled with my soul
You are like my soul
A butterfly of dream
And you are like the word: Melancholy

I like for you to be still
And you seem far away
It sounds as though you are lamenting
A butterfly cooing like a dove
And you hear me from far away
And my voice does not reach you
Let me come to be still in your silence
And let me talk to you with your silence
That is bright as a lamp
Simple, as a ring
You are like the night
With its stillness and constellations
Your silence is that of a star
As remote and candid

I like for you to be still
It is as though you are absent
Distant and full of sorrow
So you would’ve died
One word then, One smile is enough
And I’m happy;
Happy that it’s not true

A few years back , I had an obsession of pleasing God. I wanted to be holy at all times. You can’t imagine how i wake up each morning and feel my soul yearn to be with him.

I lost that fervor.

I’m trying to reawaken that my passion for GOd. I’m trying to clear my flustered mind and redirect it to the path i want to pursue.And i need help.

Most of us, as aged as it may sound, remembers God  only when there’s something troubling in our mind and hearts. We turn to him when difficulty arises; yet turn our backs after we are relieved of it.

GUILTY! I hear my heart shout.

Something very upsetting in an ordinary person’s point of view,happened to me that made me realized to pray and love God again.

Now, i see it as a test by God. Even Mike my special friend who i get to talk to last night told me thesame thing.What matters most is what your heart tells you. That is what you should believe in.

God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him. It is our responsibility to love him, study his word, deepen our relationship with him and learn to evaluate our choices in the light of biblical wisdom.

I’d like to ask for prayers from everyone who by any chance get to read this and even feel taht i need some help. Help me as i try to be worthy of Christ’s name.

    Wow! My first entry for the year..YEAh YEAh..Probably a year ago ,I would have been more excited to write a more jolly,Goggly ( googLy Bear??) kind of entry to start the year.

    Right now i feel like i am floating yet doing all my might to attend my class 3 hours ago and blog before i get knocked out ( ow! speaking of knock Out Yahoo! Pacquiao Won!) Funny how my mood plays along to doing the things that i wouldn’t normally choose to do. Like writing an entry right now!But i guess its time that i put something here.

    I don’t want to go through a review of what happened to me in details during the holidays because as much as i don’t want this to turn into such a bore,i’d actually bore myself into doing it too.But there’s an idea .It was pretty eventful holiday for me.Nothing really exciting to tell but nevertheless it was all good.and fun

    Inserting thought: I feel old. or more matured (hehehehe).

    I have a lot of ideas and things in mind for this year. Though i don’t want to focus much on those things first.That’s always my mistake.I tend to be lost in those kinds of thoughts that i forget about reality that i’d have to deal with for the moment and it sucks if you hit by it and get snapped out from your reverie.So with that,I could just hope and wish for a year better than the last.

    NO MORE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION S FOR ME.I don’t always get to do them anyway…hehehehhe

ItS bEen A whiLE….CoUlDn’T BrInG mYSeLF TO WrITe ThE ThINgS OuT of My hEAd.EVeRyThINgS BeEN FAr tOo cOmPliCAtEd LaTelY IT’s HaRd To fInd ThE RiGhT woRDs. GuEsS ThESe TwO SoNGS PReTtY MucH SuMS It AlL uP ….

鱼对水说：你不懂我的心。

水对鱼说；我懂，因为你活在水里。

鱼对水说：你看不见我的眼泪，因为我在水中。

水对鱼说；但我能感觉到你的眼泪，因为你活在我心中。

曾经有一份真诚的爱情放在我面前, 我没有珍惜, 等我失去的时候, 才后悔莫及, 人世间最痛苦的事莫过于此！如果上天能再我一次机会的话, 我会对那个女孩子说三个字：我爱你。如果非要在这份爱上加上一个期限, 我希望是……一万年。