DaXxS’ QuAck QuAcKs

A Friend of Mine

He’s three years my junior and fondly refers to himself as my “baby boy” Standing at 5’9, I think it’s pretty adorable of him to make up such a pet name. It has caught on somehow and I’ve gotten the hang of calling him as such though I must admit, it’s still difficult to suppress a smile each time I utter those two words. Come to think of it, it’s never easy to keep a straight face around him. He comes up with the wittiest replies that never fail to crack me up. The same way he consistently takes my breath away with every encounter. He carries himself really very well, very neat in his ways yet not one big stiff. I can’t help but swoon at each sight of him. He walks with the coolest gait and holds his head in the snazziest way perhaps to flaunt his well styled crowning glory.

Eating plays his first fiddle, I love to see him devour his favourite yummies – he can consume a hundred fries and still have room for burgers. Watching other people gobble up that much food makes me wanna throw up but when its him all I can do is offer him a glass of coke and whistle in amazement.

He’s the best listener I’ve ever met. He likes to be heard so he gives others the same privilege. He’s always interested in what I have to say. He remembers my stories even the littlest details. That makes me feel special J . His invitations for walks are more than enough to make me special and send me to cloud 9.

Unfortunately, I am unable to match the joy he brings to me. Though I know that shared conversations are appreciated. I am aware that my words don’t end him transcending sky high the way his do to me. He’s more to me than what I am to him. I love him but he doesn’t love me. For a time I thought I wouldn’t be able to keep pretending and that my heart would explode if I continue on playing the game. For a time, I felt I had to walk away from the friendship. It wasn’t a real one anyway, I reasoned. I had ulterior motives. He might say I was taking advantage!

I schemed ways out of the relationship then I realized I would be on the loosing end if i let go just because I had this feelings. He may not love me back the way I love him but he has taught me more than just a few lessons along the way and surely there would be more in days to come.

I may never be more than just a friend to him but, as one song goes…” then again I’m glad.”